How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
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