you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
