why im i the only drunk person in the library?
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize