I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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