What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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