I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Your dad touched me again.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
