We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
love makes seman taste better
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I enjoy the company of your penis
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
