So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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