ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
