i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
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