Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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