Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
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