Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
