im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
