Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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