Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
