he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.