Its about making memories worth repressing
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
