Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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