I want to walk on stilts...naked
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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