Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
