if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize