I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
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