Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
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