Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Randomize
