im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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