Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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