Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Randomize
Follow @tfln