Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.