So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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