she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
