my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I think people are normalizing furries
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
