i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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