Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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