I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
