i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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