love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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