She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
