a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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