margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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