dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
he was CRYING into my vagina
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize