I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize