we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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