Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
How external is "for external use only"?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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