you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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