I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
