This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
