what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
