You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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