Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
im having a threesome with these popsicles
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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