I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
