who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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