Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
